Banana: The Fate of the Fruit that Changed the World

"Banana" is a "Low-Probability" Word for Typographical Errors

Above: The world's most beautifully designed search engine. Wikimedia Commons License.

That's according to the very cool Typo of the Day for Librarians blog, which posts a single word each day and - by searching electronic catalogues - determines how high the chances are that it will be misspelled in those records. They also add a little snippet about the word in question, and when the name of the world's best-loved fruit was chosen, I was happy to see that a mini-review of my book was included. 

I think the first impression one might have on encountering this site is one of novelty, but there's cool utility here, as well. Though modern search engines automatically  recognize frequently misspelled words and do the correcting for you, but the TOTDFL blog is conducting real-time research in how mistakes appear and behave in both the digital realm and - via the collections that the databases link to - the analog world, as well. 

According to the site - which solicits participation from librarians all over the world - he word "banana" has a low chance of being misspelled. The database the group searched found seven bad versions of the word (the commonly used "Bannana," which most spell-checkers catch.)

Great site for word geeks, and thanks for making an example of me. I'm glad they didn't comb my book for spelling errors, of which my readers have found over a dozen (one day, I promise, I'll post a list of corrections - spelling and factual - here, so feel free to mail me your own lists of my screw-ups.)

No Cups or Glasses Necessary...

This is a demonstrator project created by Japanese designer Naoto Fukasawa. I love the idea, because it really does capture what a banana skin is. The colors, shape, and texture are perfect.

Here's Fukasawa's design for a strawberry juice box:

Here's a second version, with a similar design. This one is actually on the market in Japan, I'm told, which is why it is less clean: the package needed information on it.

Less clean, but still lovely compared to some of our stateside juice packaging horrors:

and:

You get the idea.

Thanks for the tip, Dimitri (again!)

Make Your Own Chandelier Out of Chiquita Boxes

This is just about the coolest thing ever. Dutch designer Anneke Jacobs first made this light fixture out of banana boxes in 2003 - but now, she's released DIY instructions. I'm going to get to work on mine right away (you can buy one, too, if the project seems too daunting.)

Download the plans here (PDF file.)

via InventorSpot; thanks, Dimitri!

Banana Nut Cheerios: Review and Rant

You can barely see the bananas on the package, and the product itself could do with a bit more banana flavor, too.

You will think I'm a lousy sourpuss for saying this, but there are WAY too many kinds of Cheerios. But that's because you probably don't know how many kinds: Eleven. That's right. With the addition of the new banana-nut flavor, you now need your toes to count the number of varieties of America's favorite breakfast food that are currently available on store shelves.

I don't care how much you love Cheerios. Eleven kinds? That's insane! (There are two Yogurt Burst flavors; only one is shown.)

The other thing that's totally sucky about Cheerios is the brand's constant harping on the "fact" that eating it "may" reduce the risk of heart disease. SHENANIGANS and BOGOSITY! Not eating a lot of bacon may reduce the risk of heart disease, and Cheerios may a breakfast delight, but can't cereal just be advertised as something that tastes good, even if two of the Cheerios varieties are shameless imitations Kellogg's Froot Loops and Apple Jacks - a couple of the best-tasting bowl-and-milk horrors ever created? (See links below for the actual health claims, and why they're the bunk.)

Aa far as eating the new variety goes, I'd say the banana taste could be more pronounced, and I'm not sure the overall concept of putting banana in the cereal itself (rather than into the bowl with cereal, as has been done since Chiquita came up with the idea, nearly a century ago - the story of the development of bananas+cereal as a recipe is in my book) is a step in a good direction. Still, I rank the product pretty high on the breakfast taste scale. Bonus points for doing it without artificial flavors. If you like Cheerios, they're worth trying.

General Mills has a special Banana Nut Cheerios website, with a movie, nutritional info, recipes, and a 55-cents off coupon. There are also some "banana fun facts," some of which are - if not wrong - then poorly worded (like this one: "There is no such thing as a banana tree. Bananas grow on plants." I think what they mean to say is that bananas are an herb, or that bananas grow on what are basically stems.)

More about Banana Nut Cheerios (including coupon) here.

Crazy, hyped, manipulative nutritional claims about the cereal brand here. Info on why those claims are completely bogus here.

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Bonus breakfast suggestion - thinking about Cheerios for your kids? Consider that the vampiric occult treat, also from General Mills, contains THE SAME AMOUNT OF ADDED SUGAR - twelve grams per 27 gram serving - than at least two Cheerios varieties - Apple Cinnamon and Frosted (Banana Nut comes close, with nine grams.) And much of Count Chocula's sugar is delivered in the optimal form of marshmallows. Manufacturer's nutritional claims for Count Chocula: none. Suggested nutritional claim: feed this to your kids and they will grow up to be INTERESTING. More on the demonic dark lord of daybreak delight here.

[Posted with iBlogger from my iPhone]

Stocking Stuffers, 2008

When you're the 'banana guy', you're blessed with special cheer: Gifts like these.

Item one is a massive bar of soap - about the size of a mango - with this lovely banana branding. On opening, it turns out to be a Portuguese-made beauty bar marked "confianca", or "confidence".

No banana scent, but the word "banana" was brought to us in the15th century by Portuguese traders, who found the fruit being grown at a town near the mouth of the Congo river by the same name.

Second on the list: this silicon "banana handle," designed as a compact potholder. Slip the peel onto the handle of a hot skillet, and you won't get burned. I tried it last night on a pot of spaghetti sauce, and it worked!

Thanks to the Thompson family for the loot.

[Posted with iBlogger from my iPhone]

This Thanksgiving, One Condiment to Rule Them All

Got this at a Philippine grocery a few blocks from my house in Los Angeles. Price: $1.59. The lady behind the counter called it "banana ketchup," and that's pretty much what it is, with the same basic ingredients - sugar, vinegar, salt, and spices - as the tomato stuff, but with bananas substituted for the red fruit base.

There are a bunch of varieties from Jufran. The product is listed at Ketchupworld.com, with both regular and hot versions; neither of these seem to be the one I found - the ingredients listed for both are different. The ketchup site gets $3.50 for a mail-ordered bottle. Searching around, it seems that the product has multiple incarnations, with different labeling - some designated as "sauce," others as "ketchup," and some using bright red food coloring to make them look more like the real thing. Mine is marked as "The Original," so I'll go with that.

How did ours taste? Fantastic: a little spicy, a little sweet - with the same consistency as tomato ketchup. I had mine on a big hunk of Turkey breast. Whupped the daylights out of cranberry sauce.

All hail the new King of Condiments.

Here's a link to a brief wikipedia entry on banana ketchup.

Insane Banana Diets Can Also Raise Prices - Which Proves Something

Lots of folks emailed me news items on this. Japan has gone nuts for the "Morning Banana Diet," which promises to help you lose weight with this formula: you start in the morning with a breakfast of bananas and room-temperature water, then eat whatever you want - other than desert - the rest of the day. You can't eat later than six in the evening. you don't need to exercise, and people are going nuts. A half-dozen books on the diet have become best sellers, and the price of the fruit has shot up to over $3.00 per pound (more than quadruple what we pay in the U.S., and well over triple the average price in a Tokyo supermarket.)

The backstory? An opera singer told a talk show she'd lost over 30 pounds on the banana diet. The craze began from there.

Happy dieter, from a Reuters pic that accompanied a Time magazine story on the diet.

A spokesperson for Dole - the nation's largest banana importer (second largest in the world) - told Great Britain's Daily Mail that this was "the first time bananas have been so scarce. Right now, we are finding ourselves unable to meet demand."

There was an earlier banana diet craze, in 1995, that began with the U.S. release of a book called "The Amazingly Simple Banana Diet," by Clifford Thurlow (who also wrote a biography of Salvador Dali.) I couldn't find any details on the actual program, sadly, or whether Japan's morning banana regime was similar to it.

Does the diet work? Sure. If you eat fewer calories than you take in, then you'll lose weight. If you skip your normal breakfast, and substitute a banana; and cut out alcohol and desserts - both of which might reasonably be assumed to be part of the diet of a person who might want to drop a few kilos, you'll accomplish that goal. The books claim that the diet achieves weight loss through a lot of metabolic bunkum, which would be nice. In the 1920s, American banana companies hired armies of doctors to promote all kinds of health claims about the fruit, but even then, they pretty much stuck to the truth.

And even at three bucks a pound, you'll still save money, after you weigh the price of what you've foregone, versus the single banana you've slotted in per day.

To get a little serious: as I've said in the past, the price of bananas is key to the fruit's success - they are the cheap fruit. Things like disease and weather threaten to raise costs to point at which the fruit returns to its "genuine" state - an expensive, tropical rarity. I've advocated, as a solution to any future banana crisis, that importers look into providing a portfolio of banana varieties - as those same companies do with apples and citrus - that would diversify the crop and offer the fruit along a spectrum of tastes and prices. In its own ridiculous way, the Japan craze has proven that consumers will pay more for bananas if they that the fruit offers something more than just a partnership with corn flakes.

Shirt of the Month

Shirt donated by the great Rich Snodsmith. Model: Gia de los Muertos.

Ugandan Comfort Food Championships Underway. Your Local Market Next?

Matooke flour, courtesy Ugandan Presidential Initiative on Banana Industrial Development Programme

Steaming banana leaves for matooke. Full video sequence here.

There's a knock-down, drag-out contest going on right now in Kampala - held as a precursor to next month's World Banana Congress in Kenya - to see which chef makes the best Matooke, a Ugandan banana dish which I describe in my book as "the macaroni and cheese of the African highlands."

The contest began with over 100 chefs offering their recipes made with tooke, a flour made from East African Highland Plantains. Nine are now left standing, and they'll face off on October 5, serving their creations at a Presidential banquet to be held at the Kampala Serena Hotel.

Here's a description of the dish, which I refer to in my book, and which is more commonly referred to, as matooke. Interesting side note - I've mentioned it several times here, but Uganda is so dependent on bananas - many people get up to 90% of their daily calories from the fruit, eating up to 900 pounds of it a year, compared to about 25 pounds of it here in the United States - that in some small villages, the word for food, banana, and this signature dish are actually all the same. The description is from the Uganda Tourism website.

"One popular local dish is matooke (bananas of the plantain type) which are cooked boiled in a sauce of peanuts, fresh fish, meat or entrails. Matooke really goes with any relish, except that the best and most respectable way the Baganda cook it is to tie up the peeled fingers into a bundle of banana leaves which is then put in a cooking pan with just enough water to steam the leaves. When properly ready and tender, the bundle is removed and squeezed to get a smooth soft and golden yellow mash, served hot with all the banana leaves around to keep it hot. In Buganda, the food production process revolves around the banana tree. Tender banana tree shoots are removed from the plant and singed over fire to make a fine foil into which chunks of pork or beef are tied up and steamed on top of a bundle of bananas. This style of cooking preserves all the flavours and cooks up food like a pressure cooker, if not better. Dry banana leaves are used like bandages when bundles of matooke are being wrapped up for steaming. Strips and chunks cut from the banana tree stem can be used as a foundation at the bottom of the cooking pan so as to avoid the boiling water touching the bundle of the matooke being steamed.

I wish I was in Kenya to taste the gourmet versions, which are probably not entrail-laden. The dish, which can also be prepared with banana flour, may be coming to stores near you, according to a report published by the New Vision Ugandan news service. "We believe there is a huge market locally and globally for value added matooke products,” said. Dr. Florence Isabirye, director of the Ugandan Presidential Initiative on Banana Industrial Development Programme (PIBID.)

Here's a recipe for matooke. You can use green plantains. It won't be the same, but you'll get the idea.

Superstar Librarian's Custom "Read" Poster

From Steve Campion's flickr photostream, here.

I met Steve Campion at the American Library Association's annual convention in Anaheim, California last spring. He made (and is the true star of) this awesome poster, which is a variant on the "Read" campaign that's been encouraging kids to improve their literacy. Steve also reviewed Banana on his MostlyNF blog, which is a great resource for finding other interesting non-fiction books (Steve averages nearly 100 a year!)

First Harvest of New Banana Toys (?) for the Holidays

I have no idea, and if I did, I wouldn't share it.

There's a world of bizarre banana toys out there, but these are especially strange, and with the holidays approaching - OK, not really; but here in the U.S., the shopping frenzy has begun to begin, because that's just how we roll - these are both super-weird and, in some cases, even unfathomable. I'll post just two samples, both from Jill Harness at the Inventorspot.com blog. Above, whatever. Below: inflatable key rings, which are actually kind of functional. Canoe, picnic, capsize, lose the camera but salvage the drive home - happens all the time.

All this stuff is from Japan, of course. There's more in Jill's original entry. Links to purchase, too.

Blow-up key chains with suffocating bananas trapped inside. Generally, controlled atmospheres are used for ripening the fruit. Not sure if this was the intention here.

The Banana Splits: A Freaktastic Television Show Returns

Photo: PR Newswire

Readers from other countries, you'll just have to take my word for it: "The Banana Splits" was one of the strangest things ever presented to children as entertainment. It was an NBC show with costumes created by Sid and Marty Kroft, who might best be described as Walt Disney, split into two by genetic mutation, dropped into a vat of ergot, and unleashed onto the world with at least temporary carte blanche to produce television for adolescents and potheads. Since I was the former, and the grownups in my house were the latter, I have warm memories of Saturday morning gatherings to watch this program.

Four costumed creatures made up "The Banana Splits" (the name came from the rock band they formed; their jingle - also known as the 'Tra La La' song - was so genuinely catchy that it was appropriated as the hook for Bob Marley's "Buffalo Soldiers.") The quartet are Fleegle the Dog, Drooper the Lion, Bingo the Gorilla, and Snorky the Elephant. They live in a Banana Pad and drive in their Banana Buggy, which is more than most people in the banana world can say.

In a press release, Warner Bros. executive Jordan Sollitto, promised that the new version of the program would stay true to the original: "Everything that made The Banana Splits hugely popular in the '60s is back," he said. I believe this, especially since medical marijuana can be purchased by just about anybody who's willing to say they have a hangnail in California, where the show is produced. Definitely replenish your stash prior to visiting the show's website, whose accompanying soundtrack and multimedia you will find either completely hypnotic or very, very upsetting - just as the original show was.

Also, you can join a club and get an awesome membership card:

Read the hilariously titled press release: "Warner Bros. Serves Up Four Scoops of Hilarity With Relaunch."

UPDATE: The BBC sort of debunks the Bob Marley/Banana Splits song similarity. Audio from both is included, so listen for yourself and decide.

Crab Fishermen think Bananas are Bad Luck

You may safely wear this brand of undergarment when seeking The Deadliest Catch.

My Dad sent in this one. Apparently it is bad luck to bring a banana on a fishing boat. There's an entry on the "How Stuff Works" website that attempts to explain why. One theory is that boats carrying bananas - prior to refrigeration - had to move too fast (too keep the fruit from spoiling), which prohibited fishing. That idea dates back to the 1700s. Another was that sailors might choke to death on the fumes of overripe bananas in cargo holds. Finally, there was the idea that crew members could slip and fall on rotting banana peels.

I have no clue what the answer is. But the funniest part of the account of the superstition is that it is so extensive that it involves an underwear check: if you're wearing "Fruit of the Loom" tight-whites, you'll have to go commando - or at least cut the label off - before you're allowed on board. Underwearfortunately, I am required to call shenanigans on this one, since there is not - and has never been (see images) - a banana on the company's label.

You may board when ready.

How to Shine Your Shoes with a Banana

I've been asked about this a bunch of times. It works, but I still prefer a real shoeshine. Still, by popular demand...

The image says it all, but to spell it out:

Step one: peel banana.
Step two (and this is KEY): remove stringy stuff from inside of peel.
Step two: wipe on shoes.
Step three: impress everyone with how neat and spiffy you look.

Here's a better tutorial on Wikihow, which says that the reason the peels do such a good job is that the fruit's natural oils work genuine-polish-like magic on shoes; in addition, bananas contain potassium, which, Wikihow says, are "a key ingredient in commercial shoe polish."

I have to call shenanigans on Wikihow. Yes, they do teach you how to polish your shoes with a peel. Yes, the goofy guy picture (below) from their tutorial rules. But potassium? First of all, I can't find any reference to shoe polish that shoes it as a "key ingredient" in shoe polish (Wikipedia lists the product's components as "natural and synthetic materials, including naphtha, turpentine, dyes, and gum arabic.") Second, even if potassium is an ingredient in shoe polish, what would that have to do with anything? The nutrient is in the fruit, not the peel.

Still, the goofy guy rules. Now, go out and shine your shoes.

Not Everyone Thought the Gros Michel Banana Variety was Better...

Count Lasher: Jamaican recording star and banana lover, "lover" being the operative word. Image: MentoMusic.com

Background: The banana we eat today is a variety called the "Cavendish." But it isn't the breed your grandparents ate. That fruit was known as the "Gros Michel," and it was - by all reports - a bigger, hardier, and better tasting fruit than the one we now consume. But the Gros Michel was susceptible to a disease that wiped it out as a commercial crop by the 1960s. The Cavendish was only adopted because it resisted that disease. Today, a new form of the disease is back, and this time, the Cavendish is the banana getting sick. There's no cure in sight. But did everyone prefer the taste of the Gros Michel? Apparently not...

There are tons of banana songs - the Chiquita jingle and Day-O (actually called "The Banana Boat Song") are among the best known - but my current favorite has to be "Robusta Banana," a song recorded in the 1950s by a Jamaican singer named Count Lasher. Here's just one verse of the song, which mentions several banana breeds:

"Gros Michelle" she said, "is not too bad" - People like it when it is cooked with shad - But I don't eat shad. I eat fresh fish - So I've got to have Robusta in my dish"

I was made aware of the tune by Mike Garnice, an expert on Jamaican Mento, a musical precursor tp the ska and reggae most of us are familiar with. Mike read my book, and became a banana enthusiast: "I am now the foremost banana expert where I work, and always have an eye out for non-Cavendish varieties. I'm writing you to make you aware of a c.1956 Jamaican song about bananas. It's by Count Lasher, Jamaica’s greatest mento star. I think you’ll get a kick out of the lyrics. My next trip to Jamaica will have to include a Robusta!"

Image: MentoMusic.com

I had to let Mike know that Robusta is a form of Cavendish, and the reason it probably was preferred was because it was fresh! As noted in my recent post about Coquimba, the banana company that's trying to bring just-from-the-tree Cavendish to local markets in the U.S., a fresher banana tastes far better than one that's been shipped and stored and refrigerated and gassed (in order to delay ripening) on the way to supermarkets, as the bananas we buy are.

Jamaica was where the very first supermarket bananas (of the Gros Michel variety) imported to the U.S. originated, back in 1879 - they were imported to New Jersey by a sea captain named Lorenzo Dow Baker. He went into partnership with a New England entrepreneur named Andrew Preston, and the company they founded - Boston Fruit - is known today as Chiquita.

Mike sent me a link to his website, which is all about Mento, and includes the very suggestive Lasher lyrics, which mention several banana types. There's also a clip from the song.

Thanks, Mike!

Banana Juice Research in India is conducted by Nuclear Energy Experts

Atomic banana juice from India

This is really more than you'll ever want to know about extracting juice from bananas, but it is interesting, because the folks at India's Bhaba Atomic Research Centre have figured out ways to squeeze a lot more juice from the fruit than previously was thought to be possible. I don't know why the nuclear scientists are spending time doing this, though my (absolutely uninformed) guess is that atomic research involves advanced centrifuges, and so do the juice extraction techniques described on the linked pages. A second guess might be more political: India's atomic energy program is a huge source of national pride and strategic military importance. Bananas are also a source of national pride - and are of huge importance to the national diet. Maybe it isn't so silly that top minds and resources would be devoted to working on both in a single facility?

Or maybe these guys just have a lot of time on their hands and got thirsty.

A Visit to the New Home of the International Banana Museum

Top Banana Glen Speer

A humble exterior, four miles south of Interstate 15.

I finally got a chance to visit the new home of the International Banana Museum (previous posts here and here) earlier this month. It was awesome! I just missed Ken Banister - the museum's founder, who moved his banana collection from the Los Angeles suburb of Altadena to the high desert town of Hesperia, California, about a year ago, but I found myself in the able hands of Glen Speer, whose business card lists him this way:

GLEN SPEER

Genuine Antique Christian Person

BEEN THERE, DONE THAT, CAN"T REMEMBER

Free Advice!

Top Banana - Banana Museum

Hesperia, CA

His credentials turned out to be impeccable and true. Glen graciously showed me around, recommended that I have lunch at the omelette place across the street - over 100 types of egg-based dishes - and encouraged me to take lots of pictures, which I did. As I was leaving, another local told me to quit with the snapshots: "You'll make his head even bigger!" But from the looks of things, Glen has a lot to be proud of.

More on the museum, including additional pictures, after the jump.

Couldn't agree more...

Farmers Market, 3rd & Fairfax, Los Angeles, May 5, 2008

LA Times on Banana Museum

Best banana picture ever - from the banana museum's website

Fake memoirist, real novelist, and - best of all - Oprah nemesis James Frey mentions Altadena banana museum; Los Angeles Times uses "banana expert" (me) to confirm that it exists (or existed; it has since moved to Hesperia, in the California high desert.)

About the picture: The proprietor of the museum, Ken Banister, has his shirt open at the belly. He is standing above a "banana club" logo, and next to a pile of bananas. A man who has burst into flames runs in front of them. To Ken's left a child on an adult's shoulders seems to stare in amazement. To the right, two adults laugh. The man closer to Banister seems to be applauding. All the way on the left side of the picture, a man in a pork pie hat and red knee socks, sitting and only half in frame, appears to be indifferent to the spectacle.

What in heck is going on here?

Adios, bananero...

When I visited Honduras, one of the most interesting people I met was Gene Osmark, a former Chiquita researcher who regaled me with stories of both the good - and bad - old days of banana company dominance in Latin America. Gene wasn't one to pull a punch, and my conversations with him were honest, fascinating, and sometimes shocking. I received word that Gene passed away last week; he was, as Ivan Buddenhagen - another renowned banana researcher - remarked, "one of the last of the old guard."

Comment: it is, perhaps, too easy to see that old guard as simply part of a system of exploitation and misery. It is more complicated than that. As a corporate entity, United Fruit - Chiquita - did great damage. It wouldn't be a stretch to call it evil. But many of the scientists who worked for the company tried hard to improve the land they grew bananas on and the lives of the people they lived amidst. This is especially true of the post-1950s era banana researchers, who acutely understood the history that they were a part of.

There are fewer and fewer of these original banana folk left. Anyone interested in the history of the banana industry in Latin America would do well to spend time getting information from a primary source. I recommend you check out "Banana People," a collection of first-hand accounts of life working for Chiquita, assembled by Clyde Stephens, a former bananero now living in Florida.

Here's a description of the book:

"This book is a collection of short stories by BANANA PEOPLE who lived in the Tropics and savored a unique period that is now past history. Fifteen writers relate their favorite adventures, anecdotes, history, intrigues of the banana business and exciting plantation lifestyles of a bygone era. Contributors had a wide range of tropical experiences and include a former president of the United Fruit Company, vice presidents, engineers, a medical doctor, research scientists, accountants, pilots, professors and others."

You can order it for $20, plus shipping, here.

What does Keira Knightley have to do with our endangered banana?

She's shooting a movie called "The Duchess," where she plays Lady Cavendish, the 18th Century Duchess of Devonshire. Here's the description of the movie from AceShowbiz:

"Duchess chronicles the life of 18th century aristocrat Georgiana, duchess of Devonshire, an ancestor of Princess Diana who was alternately celebrated and reviled for her extravagant political and personal lives. Accompanying Knightley in the cast are Ralph Fiennes as William Cavendish, the fifth Duke of Devonshire, and Dominic Cooper as Charles Grey, the second Earl Grey."

In my book, I explain that our banana - the endangered one - is called the Cavendish. It is named after the Duchess's son, the third William Cavendish, and the sixth duke. This Cavendish - who never married, and was known as "the bachelor duke" - spent his time building up the family estate's gardens and greenhouses. Around 1830, he received a sample banana plant that had been brought to England from the South Pacific. The Cavendish banana's stock eventually was brought to the Caribbean, where it became the "mother plant" for most of the fruit we eat today.

Monkeys+Bananas=Moola?

California's latest racket lottery game is "Go Bananas," a scratch-off contest that claims odds of about one winner per every five tickets (at a buck each.) That includes tickets that win you other tickets. The chance of getting real cash are twelve to one. In the interest of public service, I've purchased five tickets, labelled them, and will scratch one out every day for the coming week. If you're really bored, check back in tomorrow to see what I won (half of everything I win will go to Bioversity International, the banana conservation organization.)

THE WAY THE TICKET WORKS: You scratch off six boxes. If three match you win. There's a bonus "quick $10 spot" box that - if the number ten is revealed - nets you that amount of money.

MONDAY I LOST. Got a pair of $6.00 scratches, and one $500. Tease. TUESDAY I LOST. Got a pair of $150s. WEDNESDAY, THURSDAY, FRIDAY, LOST LOST LOST! Lesson: you can't save bananas with lottery tickets.

Here's a stupid page from the California lottery that lists the entire array of theft devices they offer.

The point of all this, besides making me richer than the book ever could, is to point out - once again - that the origin of the term "go bananas" is not necessarily known. See here.

Amazing Chiquita banana cartoon from the 1940s

Images from the ASIFA-Hollywood Animation Archive. Read the full post for direct links and downloadable (!!!) cartoons.

In the 1940s, as disease ravaged banana plantations in Latin America, the major banana companies implemented strategies to convince consumers to buy their particular brand of fruit. The Chiquita banana campaign was, and is, one of the most successful in marketing history. The singing, dancing, sexy fruit was based on the real-screen cinema exploits of Brazilian bombshell Carmen Miranda, who'd famously cavorted with man-sized bananas in the 1942 Busby Berkeley musical, “The Gang’s All Here.”

More great banana art from Gonzalo Fuenmayor

"Cuando las Miradas no Alcanzan," 47x47", oil on canvas, 2005

"Unaited gui Stand," 92 x 44 inches, oil on canvas, 2003*

Gonzalo is an artist from Colombia, site of some of the must brutal violence in the sad history of the Banana Republics. His grandfather worked for United Fruit (Chiquita), and tried - Gonzolo told me in an email - to paint a more sympathetic picture of the banana giant, which was responsible for the massacre of at least 1,000 banana workers during a strike in 1929 (the bloodshed was fictionalized by Gabriel Garcia Marquez in "100 Years of Solitude."

The conflict between differing versions of the story - and Gonzalo's own soul-searching about the relationship between the fruit, his own life, his culture, and his family give his work a high level of intensity (which is enhanced by the size of his canvases - some bigger than eight feet across.) I love these paintings. The feel both documentary and impressionistic, all at once.

A giant wall of (almost) rotting bananas...

This comes from Oddity Central, via Terri Wahl (aka Auntie Em): New York artist Stefan Sagmeister has installed a panel of 7,200 bananas at the Deitch Projects gallery. This fruited megalith was put up on January 31 as part of the "Things I Have Learned in My Life So Far" exhibit, which hinges around the idea of continuous transformation (the structure itself is in a state of rapid change - rather fetid at this point, since yellow cavendish bananas generally last about seven days before mushing up. The yellow brown barrier tumbles down next week.)

Links: Gallery - Artist - Show>

Visitors to ex-banana castle are welcomed by goddess Venus with open no arms.

Converting former factories to art spaces isn't new - but turning an old banana processing facility into one is. This ex-industrial building, in Bethlehem, Pennsylvania, was once the home of D. Theodoredis & Sons Inc., a Chiquita subsidiary that distributed fruit to markets in the northeastern U.S. The old plant included ripening rooms - where temperature and atomosphere are controlled to keep fruit green as long as possible - and was a receiving point for fruit brought by trains from ports along the eastern seaboard.

The 63,000 square foot plant was repurposed in 1998 as the "Banana Factory," a community art center that includes galleries, classrooms, studios, and a theater (the "factory" part of the name is a misnomer, but it somehow feels appropriate; I wonder if locals called it that historically.)

I'm working on finding out how long the Theodoredis operation ran, when it was sold to Chiquita, and when it was shuttered. I'd like to hear from you if you know anything about the old banana operation, if you've visited the art center, and especially if you can make any before-and-after comparisons. Leave a comment or email me at the link on my "About" page.

Here's a link to the Banana Factory.

Another great banana blog

I just discovered the really cool "Yummy Banana" blog, which features banana pictures, recipes and philosophy (!!!) from around the world. My favorite entry? This image of a Cavendish banana with monkeys drawn on it.

By the way, in colonial Mexico - this was the time of the Spanish inquisition - prisoners often communicated with each other by hiding notes inside bananas.

Visit Yummy Banana. Or see the image at Flickr.

Banana Splits of the World

DAIRY QUEEN: "Delicious DQ soft serve covered in luscious strawberry, pineapple, and chocolate toppings, with whipped topping and nestled between a sweet banana." DQ's advantage is that it is ubiquitous; her highness has outposts in nearly every U.S. state, and internationally, too (I ate at one in Beijing.)The ice cream is special - no other soft-serve tastes like DQ - and that makes the split nearly perfect. Price: $3.00. Rating: four of five. Royal hint: go for the banana split blizzard instead - all the ingredients, mixed into a cup. Locations: Almost 6,000.



CARVEL'S "BANANA BARGE": No official description. But the picture speaks for itself. The best quality soft-serve in the bunch, but just two scoops/swirls. Unconventional name, unconventional presentation, but it works. Price: $6.00. OW! Stars: Five of five. Locations: 500 (recently opened several stores in Los Angeles.)



BASKIN-ROBBINS: "Delight in a traditional treat with your favorite ice cream flavors, two banana slices, crowned with chopped almonds, whipped cream and three cherries." About as close to the classic banana split as you can get. But traditional hard ice cream suffers in the age of Haagen-Dazs. Rating: two and a half of five. Price: about $5.00.



TASTEE-FREEZ: Claims to have invented soft-serve. I'm not so sure. But this is high-quality stuff - almost as creamy as Carvel. R ating: four of five. Price: $3.00 About 100 locations, with the most in California, Texas, and Illinois. One in Alaska.



FOSTER'S FREEZE: Weird, yucky, yellow ice milk. This California chain has passed its glory days, though you can find them in - and this is kind of yucky, too - hybridized "El Pollo Loco" stores. Plus, the picture is BOGUS: look at the glass dish. Price: $3.00 Rating: one of five. Locations: About 40.




CULVER'S: This midwestern chain features not ice cream, but creamier frozen custard (whole milk, egg yolks.) Don't forget to eat ten or so of the chain's "Butter Burgers," which taste exactly the way they sound: smooth as meat. Rating: SIX (!!!!) of five. Price: $4.00. Locations: 350.



SONIC DRIVE IN: Another middle-of-America chain. Best known for 1950s-style car hop service, the ice cream is pretty undistinguished (note that the regal sundae is positioned behind some DQ Blizzard-like treat in the picture.) Some stores sell deep-fried pickles. Rating: two of five (add two points if you're pregnant.) Prices: $3.00. Locations: 3,000.

More on monkeys and bananas

My friend Tim lived in Costa Rica for almost five years. He confirms not just that our simian relatives eat bananas, but also how they eat them:

"As I remember, they ate them upside down. Used their teeth to pull apart the peel. Bigger monkeys would bite chunks off or/and the smaller monkeys would break off chunks with both hands and sit and nibble or chomp away at the prized package in their hands. Actually it would be cool to get a small video of this on your site. Err...dont mean to tell you what ot do, I just remember it being real cute to watch."

Your wish is my command, amigo:

Tim, by the way, owns a really cool bike shop in Platteville, Wisconsin.

Do Monkeys Eat Bananas?

At my recent reading at Warwick's bookstore, I was asked why monkeys peel bananas "upside-down." My flippant answer was that I don't answer "monkey questions," but the truth is that I just didn't know. However, Slate, the online magazine that usually writes about important things, answered the question in 2002. "Monkeys are the real experts" in peeling bananas, writes Steven E. Landsberg during a discussion of whether bananas are better eaten - by humans - from the bottom up. (I vote against. He's non-committal; Landsberg also claims to know a guy who "scoops out the seeds" before eating a banana. Since bananas are seedless, this is a miracle, and whoever this fellow is, he needs to talk to banana breeders immediately.)

Some other general monkey/banana questions:

Q: Do monkeys eat bananas?
A: Yes.
Q: Do they peel the bananas prior to eating.
A: Yes - see above.
Q: Why do monkeys eat bananas?
A: Because they're delicious and available - same reason we do. Plus, monkeys are hungry l'il rascals, aren't they?
Q: Are gorillas litterbugs?
A: See first picture.
BONUS QUESTION: Do gorillas get bananas from trees, or vending machines?
A: See the bottom of this post.

(BTW, The monkey is Magilla Gorilla, one of Hannah-Barbera's 1960s stable of challenged anthropomorphic Saturday morning fun-time pals. See more of this huggable, luvable simian after the jump.)